The difference between seeing a place and experiencing it
Why some trips stay with us long after we return
In my early 20s, when I first started travelling with friends, I believed a good trip meant seeing everything. I was the woman with the travel checklist where landmarks were ticked off, days fully packed, proof that we’d “done” the place. I loved those trips. I came back happy, fulfilled, and armed with stories and photos to show for it.
When it came to my honeymoon though, I didn’t plan a single thing. Which was wildly unlike me, because I am - and always have been - the planner. With all the wedding planning, I simply let the honeymoon be.
And for the first time, I didn’t just see a place - I experienced it.
Travelling to see a new place
When we set out to see a place, we often carry a mental list of landmarks we want to visit and photos we want to take. There’s always that quiet pressure of the “must-sees.” I must see the Eiffel Tower. How can I come back from Rome without seeing the Colosseum?
Trips planned around seeing a place tend to be short and packed. Our days are filled with places we need to be, things we need to tick off, schedules we need to follow.
And this isn’t a bad thing.
But there’s a deeper layer to travelling that I didn’t realise I was missing - until my honeymoon in Lake Como.
Experiencing a new place
I remember coming back from Lake Como having truly remembered how I felt. I remember seeing the lake nestled between the mountains and feeling completely in awe of nature. I remember how peaceful I felt hearing the water splash by the shores. I remember how a long, four-course Italian dinner left me feeling warm and content.
Before that, on most of my trips, I had put my feelings aside. My focus was always on the checklist. I could tell you everything I saw, but I never stopped to ask myself how it felt to stand at Fisherman’s Bastion in Budapest. I only remember the satisfaction of checking it off after taking photos.
I remember my trip to Prague back in 2019, travelling with a fellow planner who had also made a physical list of places to cover. We moved from one landmark to another, ticking things off, pausing occasionally for food and photos. Today, I can only recall that trip through the pictures we took.
I can’t tell you how I felt standing in any one place - or even the small details that made it special. Because I never truly experienced it.
My honeymoon made me realise that experiencing a place is what allows it to stay with you for years. Simply seeing a place can leave you feeling oddly detached from it.
I also realised there’s no need to chase every landmark. They aren’t going anywhere. And if there’s something we miss, it simply becomes a reason to return.
Today, I value the art of taking it all in - observing the small details, allowing myself to feel a place, and experiencing the energy and quiet rhythm it holds.
